Wildness

I've been looking back through my photos and I've noticed a pattern:

 they are almost exclusively of nature, and within that they are often 'empty' landscapes, with no people or man made structures visible...

They often feature trees...

...and water...

...especially showing reflections.

But I also notice that there is a bleakness, a sense of sadness even.

Maybe I need some reflection of my own....

This too shall pass...

Sitting huddled around the fire, with doors and curtains closed to keep in the warmth it feels like midwinter.

We are sat reading in the dusk like light despite the clock telling us it's nearly lunchtime. It should feel comforting but I am unsettled, impatient. My body clock, like that of the world around me, knows that the days are lengthening.

I wake earlier now, with the morning light but as yet have only felt the pull to rise and enjoy the morning sunshine on a handful of occasions.

There are seedling everywhere, close to me, protected by the same warmth instead of spreading out as they should.They like me are on pause.

And yet I can't rid myself of the feeling

 that there is a reason for this slowness-

that I am waiting, like the winter scene outside....

and I remind myself whilst watching and waiting that...

"Nature does not hurry, yet everything is accomplished." Lao Tzu

Connection to Nature

I have spent some time this month with children and adults who only see the world in contrast-black and white, good and bad, day and night. It made me think about how my view has changed over the years, the journey I am on that has helped me to see that life is a continuum and that those two sides don't exist, if I choose not to take them. That there is only blend, or flow, a continuous cycle of energy.

I have been helped on my journey by spending more time in nature. 

As a child I was always outside, exploring and creating, immersed in the world around me.

But as a young adult I moved away from the natural world and became a smaller me, 

less of who I was and more of what others thought I should be. 

Then my children arrived, and I saw the world anew, 

I saw the sky above us as we lay on the ground together, wondering at the enormity of the universe.

And the world turned with us lying there, and I felt the connection, the awe,

and again felt immersed in the cycle. 

Realisation dawning that those events that I had thought of as bad, or wrong, were crucial in determining who I was and although they had undeniably changed me, I was still continuing to grow....

Emotional expression in loose part play

I love this time of year, it always feels like the beginning of something to me rather than the end. As I watch the leaves fall, I don't mourn their death, I admire the glorious next step on their journey. They hang, back-lit in the sunshine, smoldering, in no way moving on quietly. One part of their job complete, but another remains. 

An additional joy is found in that in their changing state they add to the innumerable loose parts that nature provides, allowing endless opportunity for us to manipulate them to our ends...

Sometimes we can manipulate things in a way that is apparently random, 

or maybe to create a 'picture' of something recognisable....

...whilst at other times perfect control is what is required....

        

But yet sometimes by being allowed to be 'out of control'...

...we can learn to express our emotions rather than burying them underneath layers of fallen leaves.

It's been a long year...

With 6 weeks to go to the end of term I've been taking stock of the events of the last academic year. 

From the autumn term when I still felt sad about leaving friends 

and colleagues...

...but excited too about the new developments in my life and career.

To the cold winter when although things were going well I still felt daunted by the task ahead of me, 

a little frozen in time.

Bu then there were signs of spring and I felt my confidence, 

in me, begin to grow;

 with support from others who believe in me and the things I wish to achieve...

...before finally, this term, feeling like the blue sky is starting to appear and I feel like this is a path I was always meant to tread...

...and that although I have only left a faint trail...

...I hope that over time, it will be become clearer for others to see, 

and for them to follow...

...until it is no longer a trail, but a road well travelled...

Signs of Spring

Annual family snowdrop walk today; a beautiful clear blue sky day-enough to lift the spirits on its own but then add in some glorious spring sights and it left us all feeling more alert, healthier and happier...

 

Half term has gone so fast but with the return to school is a return to longer days and warmth in the sun and a sense of excitement and energy-that the best is yet to come...

Why can't the woods be our playground?

A reception child asked this week-"Why can't the woods be our playground?"

He had so enjoyed being outdoors and having loose materials to use, he wanted to know why he couldn't spend more time like that.

Who can blame him when there is so much potential in the natural world...

  Sticks to dig with:        

   

 or to measure the depth of mud...

                                   ..or to make fires...

                                         ...or a shelter.

There are berries, leaves and bark for making art and jewellery...

And then think about mud, sand, snow, rocks...

 My aim over the next few months is to help Reception turn the woods into their playground and make those crucial experiences avaliable at every break and lunchtime...